This past weekend, I drove up to Chapel Hill for a reunion dinner. The group of people I spent six weeks of my life, watching Shakespeare, drinking ale, and wandering London with had a dinner at Top of the Hill. Obviously, everyone couldn’t make it, but I did. Even though I was kinda sick.
I didn’t think I was sick when I drove up, or when I sat down for dinner, but over the course of the meal, my stomach turned and lurched and it didn’t end up being the best time for me. And while I did enjoy seeing those people, it occurred to me that it still wasn’t the same, that what I missed most was the time and the place. I may go back to London again, and I may see those people again, but it will never be my last class before college graduation, my first trip to King’s Cross and Paddington Station, my one chance to actually study at Oxford.
I went to bed early Saturday night, thinking I shouldn’t have gone. But, while I sincerely hope I didn’t make anyone sick, I am glad I went, if only for Sunday.
The stomach problems were completely gone Sunday morning. I ate breakfast at Alpine Bagel, went to one of my favorite bookstores (Flyleaf Books) with two wonderful friends, then got to have lunch with them at RamsHead Dining Hall. Their omelettes are still amazing, by the way. Then, I had coffee with a different plain at Caffe Draida. I had intended to take her to Sugarland for a martini (I’ve been wanting to try one since I was 20, and it still hasn’t happened), but the coffee was really great too. They gave me a mocha bowl and we discussed writing, our plans for the next steps of our lives, and even a little wedding planning.
I’m not exceptionally happy with the way my life is right now, so it’s very tempting to romanticize the past. To be fair, my life was possibly less put together then. I think the difference was, I didn’t feel like it was supposed to be. I didn’t want it to be. You know what I wanted? To take odd jobs and live everywhere for a little while. Now I feel like I’ll never do that, but if my 20s can’t be that way, I want the other goal: the marriage, and the career, and the white picket fence.
…that is not what this post was supposed to be about. It was supposed to be about how happy I was to see my friends and how, even though the weekend began on a disappointing note, it ended happily. Instead, I sort of rambled about feeling lost. Umm…stay tuned next week?
Coming up this month: Big Hero 6, my weekend in Ireland, and my job search.